... but I don't want a relationship with you..."

Edited by LucieMay - June/10/2010 at 5:28pm

"The difference between friendship and love is how much you can hurt each other"- Ashleigh Brilliant.

The way I see things is that almost every child in the playground has a "best friend" but very few adults do because emotions are more complex in adult relationships.

Rest assured you are not alone in your situation.

i have the same problem.
i'm never seen as girlfriend material, only friends with benefits material.

i dont think ill ever fall inlove.

i've only had one true ex and i haven't talked to him since he told me he had a kid on the way ages ago. i don't know if he's even still alive (wasn't exactly the most careful with his habits after i left him). once he cooled down after the break up we talked on and off, but i wouldn't have considered us good friends by a long shot. he wanted to do the friend thing when i left him, but it made things complicated immediately after the break up and we didn't speak for months soon after.

i'm never girlfriend material either. anyone i've been interested in always sees me as another one of the guys or like their own sister. i don't tend to share my feelings because of that, but i'm sure some of them in the past kind of had an inkling. the problem in the end though is me, and i don't think i should ever get involved seriously with relationship stuff. my first relationship made it almost four years, and i can understand that not working since we were pretty young when we hooked up and basically grew up at the end of it. we were just very different people and my interest was gone. my relationship now has lasted almost four years again, and i know if things don't change i'll be ending it again. i don't have a problem making specific relationships last (at least so far), but i've been accused of "leading men on". funny thing it has never been any of the ones i've been interested in, so i don't know what i've done there. it tends to be the desperate, clingy types. anyways, if this current relationship ends i also don't see it going to a friendship thing. knowing my boy he wouldn't want it, and i don't blame him. i really am not relationship material, and i doubt i'm much of a friend either.

sometimes it is better not to be friends with those people right away. things can get complicated and often feelings are mixed. that's what happened with my ex, and once we didn't speak for a while he seemed to be just fine when we did start speaking later on. some people just aren't worth the time and effort though, and things might have just changed too much for any real friendship to be worthwhile. like already said above it isn't common for adults to have many best friends. these guys just sound like selfish jerks anyways, playing the blame game.

I'm also in the camp of women who's seen mostly as friend material, but never quite relationship material. Always just been "one of the guys", even though I'm pretty girly even around guys. I blame my super-sarcastic sense of humor. Recently one of my guy friends told me he wants to have sex with me, but doesn't want a relationship. That made things pretty awkward, and I really only talk to him online anymore.

One of the first guys I was with wound up having a girlfriend on the side (so I was the "other woman"), and I found out after we'd already messed around. When it got out he already had a girlfriend, I tried to just be friends, but that kind of fizzled out.

I think if my current boyfriend and I fully break things off here then I wouldn't want to stay friends. Two years is a long time to be with someone and I don't think I'd be able to know him in a non-relationship kind of way.

I'm a pretty damn good girlfriend, but no one seems to want to give me a shot, lulz.